Strange behavior

So a few weird things have happened to me since I found out we have sperm.

Firstly I have begun to thoroughly cleaning my house. Ok, not weird for some but for me, strange. I am scrubbing out base boards, cleaning the oven, dusting the doors. These are things I very rarely do if I can help it. Suddenly I need my house to be perfect. I actually went out and bought all new cleaning products and plastic bins to organize all of my draws and cupboards.

Secondly, although first I was extra optimistic now I have become sad again. It is so strange. While before we found out I was very hopeful, now that I know it is something that will eventually happen I am becoming bitter that it has taken so long. I don't know why I am having this stupid change of feelings. I have been through a lot to get to this point and I was so happy last week, why have I now decided to become sorry for myself? I need to snap out of this quick because it is doing me absolutely no good what so ever!